Right and wrong –The Ultimate Dilemma

I had a lazy day with no work done at all and so I thought of not working the remaining part of the day as well and dedicate it to my blogging efforts which is why this post would pop up at this hour. We seldom see people argue or fight on what is right and what is wrong and see that the people with Right intentions win at the end..But are they winners actually???Well I leave the answer to the context that provoked a fight. It happens so that the person who is judged wrong is also correct. But may be the thought process of the people around supporting the right person call the other wrong..So what I mean is that the question Right or wrong is justified only by the perception of the people looking at it or involved with it.

I came to this conclusion with several instances that I came across right from my childhood. When me and my dad watched Mahabharath on TV,I adored Karna who according to my dad was bad because he supported Duryodhana, the great Kaurava and fought against Pandavas who were his own brothers. But I looked at it differently. He simply stood by his best friend who helped him in times of need and paid him back even at the cost of fighting with his own brothers. I liked his might, his dedication and honesty as a friend.I never won on the argument with my dad that he was a great guy because he supported the wrong people but  I always admired him till day as an iconic character. This example is just to say that Right and wrong as a matter of fact is the way we put it across or the way we think about it.

Right by definition is to be in accordance with what is just, good, proper, ethically morally and legally correct. On a political front, the constitution and government decide on what is right and what is wrong. On an individualistic personal front, who decides them???For kids in a family the parents do…But for individuals grown up and with a sensibility and thinking of their own..who should be deciding this??The answer I believe is their conscience-their inner self..If I can answer my inner self if or not I did the right thing and get an answer YES, then its mostly correct. But the answer needs to be real and honest. There is a lot of difference between influencing the answer and telling oneself that it is correct and actually doing a right thing. Right ,by all means is always Right…and we will know it.

I dont buy it when somebody says that you are wrong only because I get a different answer when I ask myself..And if I get influenced by people who tell me I am wrong though I know that I am right, then I loose my individuality and identity of myself because I am muting the voice of my inner self and giving priority to the voice of somebody else..And this is wrong again..I think the decision of Right or wrong is a part of ones self development and we tend to understand these things only by mere experience..The joy in sticking and standing by what you feel is right, Fight and probably loose people in this argument but still winning on righteousness are deeds to be felt and not explained..We all might have done this at one or the other point and draw a little amount of pride from the fact of doing what we believed in was Right..

We consult people many times when in a dilemma of what is Right and what is wrong but finally cannot go ahead with doing it If we feel its wrong..Sometimes it so happens that the discretion of doing a right thing does not rest in our hands and we simply become spectators of a decision which could be wrong and in this case we cannot influence their decisions..Then do we just let the wrong happen??Thats again the wisdom of oneself.. We all don’t do the wrong things by choice it happens by chance and its never late to do the right thing when we have wronged. We surely have an inbuilt power to change it.It takes a lot of courage and strength but at the end of it its all worth it cos it’s THE RIGHT THING

I read two wonderful stories that inspired me to encapsulate these thoughts on my blog which you can read from the link below. They are good indeed.

http://www.boojle.com/forums/showthread.php?t=2115

At the cessation of the article, I just want to emphasize on one thing -Right is always Right when done righteously by oneself. It is important to strive and and keep up a Rightful image untarnished by time and be remembered for generations because that’s the only true wealth we transcend to our off springs –An unswayed hall of Rightful Fame in the book of life..He who is rightful always and can answer his own self can answer God anytime..

Success is the sole earthly judge of Right and Wrong

Family Ties -I am thankful!!!Are you???

I had a hell lot of an emotional trauma this week because of the sudden loss of somebody very close to me but it taught me something very deep...That I had to be thankful for all you know...In fact I feel may be we should all be thankful that we have such wonderful people around who constantly support us and have many a times given us the feeling that they are there..May be it was unsaid but they are simply are the flavors that back us up so well even in times when they are not aware of what they had just done to us..We all call them FAMILY and may be I will not have so many thoughts flowing about them any other day than today so I thought I should put it across..

There have been several occasions where I or may be we all take them for granted and feel they are obliged or supposed to be there to support us..as if that is the very purpose of their existence..But as a matter of truth they very well are not obliged and the fantastic part is that they know it...But still they let us feel that they are doing their duty by helping us,by being supportive,by keeping a hand on our shoulder,by guiding us...by merely making us feel that we are not alone..In life's monotonous journey,we not only forget to appreciate them but we even sometimes tend to forget or ignore acknowledging their existence...We fail to give them their due importance and more..Yet they never crib or complain..They don't demand the attention we fail to give them.They just take care of us because they believe that its a part of life for them to do.They feel that its one of those millions of reasons why they are here..on earth..and they just silently keep doing it whether or not somebody regards their efforts..and that is the reason I call them WONDERFUL people..

This happens to me most times in a week that I am very busily getting ready since I got up late and have this irritated frown on my face blaming my lack of will power to get ready soon.This irritation though is there most of the days,I feel and still hope I should have got up soon and with this resentment decide that my day is bad early in the morning even before the day has fully started.I get ready in front of the mirror with this dirty frown when my mom relaxingly sings a song or cracks a very irrelevant joke that vanishes the frown and brings in a smile that in fraction of seconds makes my day good and I spread this smile of mine in my bus and in my team in office but never did I realise that I had to give the credit of turning my day so good to my mother who had no idea of what her song or joke had done to me..Of course she deliberately lightens up my mood when she knows about it but she does it many a times unaware of how it helps me..and I fail to acknowledge her efforts every single time..

We all tend to do this because these people are always going to be with us so why thank them..They are family after all..But how can family become after all???Having mere blood ties with you don't make them your own..Its the emotional ties that make people our own..I feel every person we are emotionally bonded to is family ..with or without blood ties...They have got no business to support us listen to our sensible or senseless talks,to bear with us and stand with us through thick and thin..But yet they are there...They see us fail and fall back and come to hold us then,they see us rise to success and accomplish our goals and they come to embrace us..They in short are a part of all our happiness and sadness..They are of part of us and our very existence..So can they be counted after all and ignored??definitely not..

It really makes me sick to see a large amount of emotional Holocaust that people go through only because they fail to share their problems with their family..It is intriguing to understand why a brother cannot talk to his own sister for years despite the modern technology.These people are all having blood ties ..then may be the reluctance comes with the lack of emotional ties..Many of us may be privileged with these strong emotional bonding but we are a little lazier to tighten these strands and make the bonding strongest...Well what I am looking at is a picture perfect life with these strongest bonds..Its not unattainable for sure..Just needs a little more effort than normal..

There could be so may reasons as to why we should be thankful to our own people,but one reason that none of us can deny is that they have taught us the essence of relationships,the importance of getting bonded to people and have a social life,the relevance of connecting with others...Its because of their presence that we don't loose trust on relationships where we fail,we might be hurt by a person but we don't hate or curse the relationship.They taught us what sharing and caring means not by mere words but by deeds,actions and their own way of life..

What I feel is..if we take a little time out to understand the intimate

Well ..Gods most beautiful creation is the world we live in and what makes it most beautiful are the people that live in there..Our own people..our own Family..whom we are tied till the roots and even deeper...So we should thank them..For the sense of belonging they gave us,for the security of life they provided us,for making the place where we stay a home where we could come back everyday and rest in peace with the only solace that they are there and we are not alone..They are the inspiration to reach great heights, and our comfort when we occasionally falter..Whatever our opinions are about family..at the end of the day we all need one..Family ties are simple yet they need nourishment care and consideration to make them a fantabulous picturesque..

I am a die hard Daniel Steel fan and so should the title of the article explain.This is an excerpt below from her book with the same name which I liked..

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Books/family-ties-danielle-steel/story?id=10872379

This post on my blog is definitely to all those I call my family headed by my grandpa who thinks I write great stuff and reads them all :)my very family-mom and dad(I draw most of my emotional bonding with people from my dad,he is just like me :)),my uncles and aunts and of course my 3 wonderful cousins ,who are just like my siblings who I share emotional ties with and not to forget my 5 best friends from college who I call my extended family(They never bother to read my blog but still...:))

A heartwarming and happy family is an earlier heaven:):)

Fairy Tale of Failure

I jus sat job less thinking what I would write about when I suddenly remembered the face of the girl that I saw in the bus today who was crying…Quite a depressing way to start with..Well what I wanted to tell is what thought of mine provoked me to put this tale up on my blog..

I attended an interview very recently where the director of a company asked me what would upset me the most …I tried being diplomatic and acting smart answered him that I handle pressures  to a larger extent  and they don’t upset me much..And I am not some body who would let the pitfalls of any form hamper my work in anyways…I did not know then, if or not I was honest but a week later when they called me and said that my profile was not suitable for their job…I got my answer..I surely was upset with this fact that came by and I..definitely did not take it well…I was a little upset and took a break from work for tea..so that I deal with the disappointment..and yes I was upset cos I simply was REJECTED..

This must have happened to all of us that in one or the other sphere of life we were all rejected but we still always have this fear of being rejected or fear of failure in us..Now when this fear or failure is such a detrimental factor..why do I call this story of mine a fairy tale..Cos there surely is a beauty to it..And the beauty is the vast range of lessons this failure taught us..The beauty is the transformation and motivation this failure brought in..The beauty is the mere realization that you have accepted something  and had the guts to appreciate it with grace though you did not anticipate it..though you did not want it..

Now if I look at what was the contribution of a failure to a person..If it was not for the failure, we would not have realized the meaning of struggle ,a niche in giving up and loosing something, we would not have realized who are the real people who actually support us, if it wasn’t for a fallout we would have never known the mere fact that we as individuals could fall down and the extent to which we can deal with those kind of situations..If it wasn’t for a failure we simply would not take our quest for success so seriously..For us, an achievement would then be a mere sweet on a platter that is served to us everyday but a success after a failure is a real fruit to taste..Its a delicacy that adds colors in life..The colors of pride..

The key to success is PERSISTENCE. For

every “no” that you receive there could be a

“yes” just around the corner. Colonel Sanders

 who founded KFC was rejected 1009 times

before he heard his first yes and made it big

with his chicken recipe..He must have gone

through all the turmoil of a failure every single

time..but only to become the most successful

entrepreneur at 65.

http://franchises.about.com/od/mostpopularfranchises/a/colonel-sanders.htm

What is more important is the after life that is followed by a failure…Its really important to keep the other stands and factors constant and untouched despite our own emotional or financial or professional fall out. If a fall out has motivated you to do better and made you a better human being then its appreciable but if you change or transform as a totally different individual then there is threat of loosing your own self which rather is a heavy cost to pay because of a failure..Is it really worth it???I do not think so..No teacher in school, no lecturer in college, no boss in a company, no lover  in teens, no relative  in family can ever rule out or reject what you are or what your capabilities as an individual are..We and we solely assess our caliber and know our potential…and when we know this there is no fear of rejection at all..

We are surrounded by millions of people who keep trying with a never give up attitude..But to us, the inspiration will be drawn from these people only after we faced a so called fall out. And at this point what really helps is that we understand the power of our inner self rather than getting inspired by their stories because - for all you know, your story could be different and also because it is U who has fallen or rather thinks that you fell and also because of the truth that you will answer your questions and help yourself rather than anybody else..It just needs a change in the way you look at it..Rather than feeling why it had happened to you or that you of all the people did not deserve it..Its always helpful to realize what did you do to deal with it..How have you handled it and how many ounces more strong have you become..And that’s how one could make their failure a fairy tale..At least this is what I believe..There is nothing bad in the world that’s created by God..We could attribute a certain beauty to everything under the sun including a failure cos it simply is a lesson learnt..There is no innovation without failure. Failure is not something you avoid!  Its something to embrace..

The Art of Learning LIFE

It might take every one by a surprise that I started blogging but considering the vivid Ideas I always get whether telling my school friends that I would become a journalist or an IAS officer,my college friends that I would become a scientist whether my family that I would become a  Master chef...you all know how unpredictable I always am...It all took me by surprise as I ended up being a so called software Engineer...But nevertheless to say as I look back I really meant all those things I said above but did none...I now call it life's plan,God's destiny to convince myself why I did not pursue those things I believed in...But the fact is I never tried to chase them and make them my reality..

This might be story of millions of us who don't chase their dreams adjust to circumstances compromise with reality with grace and call it their life...But the meaning of life is the power of acceptance...It always helps when once accepts the true facets and facts of their life and make it big in the path they are in rather the path they wanted to be in..I am very sure the people who say I always wanted to be what I am are half lying..But whats important is where I am and How did I reach there...Whats more important is if or not I made an impact, I made a meaning out of the Magnum Opus word called LIFE which definitely is simple if we really make it one..

I considered all possible subjects that I have read,learn t ,heard to write about the first time on My blog,but I realized I should write about the best teacher for everyone called Life...We read inspirational books,quotes for example the write up on Steve Jobs speech,like the article about a magazine Positive plus on AIDS awareness whose editor is a young chennai based Muslim girl Asma Nazeer but what do we do then...Get inspired feel good or proud and keep the feeling within or mostly share with friends...But does that give meaning to what inspired us or the purpose of those stuff that has been written...No it doesn't..We all definitely have a zeal to make something out of the small life small opportunity that is gifted to us. But what we lack- is the word EFFORT.A good book, a great advice by a friend ,an inspirational scene in an movie they are all motivating factors but the sadness is that they only remain motivating...They do not actually become factors that gear up our actions...But not in all cases..I am only talking about people like me who don't let the factors become lessons in life...To become a positive change in their lives..

Its interesting to know something,its even interesting to share something but how interesting is it to do something..Is what many of us feel but must have never experienced the happiness of doing...Its just that we do not realize the potential we have..We are born to do so many things of which we end up to do a single thing or two and call it a life lived...But is it really a life lived???We all know the answers...We adore and admire the so called people who do most of these things and name them Achievers or Winners and just be content looking at them..But we don't take time to think that we have all the abilities they have and we ourselves could be the ones...And WINNERS in my context are not the ones who manage to get on to the front pages of Tabloids or magazines and shoot to fame because of their celebrity status...WINNERS are people who are like any body else with no name and fame but those who people look up to and say that "THEY.... HAVE LIVED".In short, people with a true meaning to life...and with a genuine smile that is derived from the sense of accomplishment of hundreds of  those many things that made others happy..

I am looking at the broader spectrum of the word LIFE...a Big one..A real big one...In all senses...It taught us so many lessons in every sphere of it,every moment of it that we live..it took us up to make us happy,it took us down to teach us the value of Rising after falling down,it nourished us like our mother and what have me made out of it...Did we do something that is worth the word LIFE as big as it is...???For all the Nos to this question...it is never late...LIFE is like our mom and one can always realize its worth..and pay it back..strictly in terms of actions and deeds and not mere promises...

Learning from Life is nothing but turning ones lessons of life  into experiences that build your future and give it a strong basement or foundation...Life is wise and we are all supposed to draw our best from its wisdom and apply it in all contexts..and make most out of it...We face most of our problems because we don't tend to understand the basic fact-Human life is so deep and vast and our Lifestyle simply is not...And the actual bliss of living is in being used up for a purpose that is appreciated by oneself,others and more than anything God..

The title of my B log's first article is again drawn from the story of a kid who draws his inspiration from Bobby Fischer and Garry Kasparov (In a book written by Josh Waitzkin) but it just was not an inspiration to me..I still remember what I read in it and I started blogging today with it as my first note..The caption was Journey in Pursuit of Excellence...and I leave it to one to define what the word Excellence means.. 

http://books.google.co.in/books?id=aAYcmC-_sM8C&printsec=frontcover&dq=art+of+learning&source=bl&ots=3Kw_EqhDY6&sig=QpnfWm8hf0v0TVCDUTLdmHTzlao&hl=en&ei=-Lg6TZv9JI_QrQe38vDzCA&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=7&ved=0CFEQ6AEwBg#v=onepage&q&f=false

I end my article with a sense of hope to improve my next one...to practice what I had posted and with the suggestion to use a problem in one area to adapt and strengthen other areas and give a positive and veracious sense to LIFE..Our constant teacher,our continuous mentor,our incessant journey...

LIFE..Is all about taking chances,about doing something that somebody said you cannot do,its about being goofy,not caring what others think,its about learning to appreciate what we have..That's Life

And here I end my first post dedicating my efforts of blogging to my MOM who inspires me to constantly learn and enrich my life and otherwise...